Monday, June 13, 2011

thoughtful hillbillies


RICK:
Hey Rick?

DICK:
Yea, Dick?

RICK:
See that sky roll on by? (points)

DICK:
...Oh, my...

RICK:
Don't i-t'almost makes yer wanner... cry?

DICK:
(Sighs) Yea, er die...

RICK:
I mean, don’t-it makes yer wanner ask… why?

DICK:
Don't think(thoughtful)- Nope. Can’t say I’d-wanner even try…

(both take a deep breath in)
(RICK exhales but DICK starts hacking and coughing)
(RICK slaps him on the back)

RICK:
Dick! Wha-happened?! Yer almost choked, why?

DICK:
Oh, Rick (coughs)... I think I swallerd-a fly!

41 comments:

  1. very playful,
    what a fun treat.

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  2. Intriguing dialogue internal turmoil, storms of spirit

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  3. Living among the southern Appalachian hill people, I so get this. Great title too. Oh, and your profile photo here is beautiful. Love that wisp of a smile!!

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  4. Hehhehe.. I found it funny! Nice!
    I am ~
    http://puplumages.wordpress.com/2011/06/03/i-me-the-butterfly/

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  5. Never read something like this..
    Nice work :)

    Alcina

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  6. clever rhyme, >.> ever consider screen plays?

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  7. actually yes. right now I'm a bit of a playwright.

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  8. I was looking for the serious side and then you made me laugh.
    It is good to laugh.
    I enjoyed reading this.
    Genebrother

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  9. LOL - What a fun, play-filled poem. Love the end!

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  10. Haha love it made me smile :)

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  11. well done. Love the script format. Really enjoyed the mixing of voice and humor at the end. Excellent:)

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  12. *coughs - not from swallowing a fly - from laughing* Well painted picture!

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  13. Hahaha! That was an entertaining read. Nice!

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  14. I like the idea of dialogue in the form of poetry. A very clever idea executed to perfection.

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  15. LOL! Nice bit of amusement!
    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/06/14/letting-go

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  16. this is awesome Amy! and gorgeous blog layout, too. You go, go :)

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  17. harhar! creatively funny :)

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  18. too funny. having spent lots of time in Tennessee, this is all too real. hee hee.

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  19. perfect.. and playful originals..

    Someone is Special

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  20. Fun poem with great rhyme and dialogue.

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  21. Clever and fun, playing with a script as a poem. An enjoyable read. Thanks.

    Richard

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  22. I loved listening in to this conversation, the flow was great and the feel perfectly playful. Much enjoyed ~ Rose

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  23. haha :D what a beautiful rhyme and flow! conversational poetry. admirable!

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  24. hello! thought i'd pop by with some biscuits, a thermos and a game of Cluedo while we sit outside LJ. Grrr!

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Reach for the clouds. . .

Tickle your toes. . .

Poets United Contributor